Equation for a Complete Outfit

I'm giving a short talk on how to accessorize on Monday to a group of ladies. In working out what I want to say, I've decided to focus on starting with a simple equation for an outfit, and then expounding upon that. The equation is: base outfit + extra layer + jewelry + statement accessory (scarf, hat, pin, etc.) + bag = complete outfit. Using that math, I've been checking myself before I walk out the door. What shape jacket or sweater do I need as an extra layer? What jewelry does this outfit need? Will a scarf or hat add the right touch? Today I've used a scarf as my statement accessory - and yes, my bag is not pictured, but I've already switched it out to the right one to go with what I'm wearing.

Could your outfit use a jacket or more jewelry? Will a scarf, hat, pin, or statement jewelry piece add the right pizzazz to make your look? And don't forget to switch out your bag for just the right one for your occasion. Good luck!

Progression of an Outfit

This post is specifically for all of you stay-at-home-moms out there. If anyone else gets something out of this, that's cool too.

Women who stay at home with children have a harder time than most looking put together. Why? Because sometimes we never leave the house. Sometimes our day includes cleaning mud off of our children. Sometimes we spend the entire day cleaning and other times, we don't think it's worth it to dress nice when our children will almost assuredly put a tear or stain in whatever we wear anyway.

This blog has always been about my quest to stay away from frump and stay in style while staying at home. So lately, to remedy my problem of trying to dress nice even if I'm not going anywhere, or even if I have a dirty job to do, I've been choosing outfits that can easily progress to fit my day's needs.

For instance, during the day when I'm just cleaning the house, cooking, on the floor wrestling with my 5 yr old, homeschooling under a blanket on the couch (Mom, you didn't see that), and taking walks with the kids, I'll start out wearing something like this:

 I'll add tennis shoes for the walk, or just wear slippers if I'm staying in all day. Usually I do leave my hair down (today was an exception) because that's what is most comfortable for me. I will also start with a little bit of make up (mascara and blush, and maybe some eyeliner and lip gloss).

Then, if I'm leaving the house during the day, or someone is coming over, I'll just add some jewelry, style my hair, and switch out my tennis shoes for a pair of heels.

 

At the end of the day, just before my husband gets home, or if I'm going out for the night, I'll really kick it up. I'll add more accessories, maybe a tailored jacket or a belt (or both), and even more make-up (a smoky eye and lipliner).  

I just think it's a good reminder that a simple jeans and sweater outfit as a base is all you need to look fabulous - and you don't have to add the fabulousness until when it's practical. Just layer it on as needed. Add a smart blazer, a romantic scarf, some great jewelry, a statement belt, a stylish pair of shoes...and no one will ever know that you started out plain. ;-) Well, I guess my secret is out now. :-)

Domestic Sophisticate Featured on Inside Out Style

The fabulously talented and stylish Imogen Lampert, the genius behind Inside Out Style, asked me to do a guest post for her blog!! My post was featured on her site today, and I'm still giddy with excitement about it! I've been learning from Imogen ever since she first started her blog and am beyond honored that she would think of me to ask for a guest post!

Finding my style part IV - Wardrobe Essentials

The next step on my path to finding my style is to make a list of items that I need in my wardrobe. I've been working on a list for quite some time now using Isaac Mizrahi's, Tim Gunn's, and Stacy London and Clinton Kelly's lists. Of course, their lists are for the modern working woman. My list needs to be adjusted for what the average SAHM woman needs.



This list I've also gone over with Missi, and both she and I consider these items to be the bare essentials to a SAHM wardrobe. I'm sure many of you have less than this list, and many of you think I'm missing some things. But this is just my opinion of what you need as building blocks to a perfectly stylish wardrobe. Of course, I love dresses, skirts, tights, and ruffles, but ultimately I do not NEED that as a SAHM...so again, this list does not include personal taste and style - it just includes what you NEED to be begin a stylish and put together wardrobe.



Also note, this list does not include jewelry essentials.

Here is what I've come up with:

Every SAHM should have:

1. 4 pairs of jeans (1 short pair for flats in dark wash for running errands, 1 short pair for tennis shoes in light wash for playing soccer with your kids, 1 long pair/dark wash for pumps or wedges for dinner out, and 1 long trendy pair for that night out with the girls)


2. 1 button down shirt in a neutral color to be worn alone, layered underneath sweaters, or accessorized with big necklaces and/or belts


3. 3 camisoles for layering (2 white or cream and one black)


4. For the summer, 3 tank tops (2 in your favorite colors and one in a neutral color)


5. 2 well fitting short sleeve t-shirts in your favorite colors for wearing alone in the summer and layering in the winter


6. 3 well fitting long sleeve t-shirts - 2 in your favorite colors, 1 in a neutral color (like white) to be layered or worn alone in the winter


7. 1 denim pencil skirt with plenty of stretch so you can move around easily in it - perfect for MOPS meetings or lunch dates


8. 1 pair of casual flats you can walk in or go to the park in (think a Skechers mary jane)


9. 1 pair of colorful flats for those short dark wash jeans


10. 1 pair of neutral wedges for those long jeans or skirt (wedges are a great alternative to a pump for the SAHM - you get the height of a pump, but the comfort and walkability of a flat)


11. 3 cardigans (2 in your favorite colors, and one in a neutral) for layering in the winter, spring, and fall


12. LBD - every woman, SAHM or otherwise, needs a little black dress. Perfect for funerals, weddings, church, or a date night - this dress should be seasonless, versatile, and fit superbly


13. 1 pair of classic black pumps for that LBD


14. 1 trendy/dressy top for those trendy jeans and that night out with the girls


15. For the winter - 1 v-neck sweater


16. For the summer - 1 pair of denim bermuda shorts and 1 pair of neutral colored bermudas


17. A trench coat - a trench is the most versatile of all coats. You can wear it in the winter over layers for warmth, you can wear it for the rain with less underneath, just to protect you from the water, and you can wear it in the milder months of spring and fall to add a little extra warmth. It is also flattering on every figure and can be dressed up or down (perfect for a SAHM).


18. A neutral colored belt that can be adjusted to a waist belt or worn low on the hips (through jean belt loops)


19. Proper fitting and good quality lounge wear (for those days when you never leave the house - which can be quite frequent for SAHMs)


20. 1 pair of tennis shoes for those tennis lessons or aerobic workouts)


21. 1 neutral summer bag, large enough for diapers and wipes, small enough to not kill your back


22. 1 neutral winter bag with same specification as seen in #18


23. For the summer, sandals you can walk in


24. For the winter, boots to wear over skinny jeans, or under skirts and dresses (my preference is the wedge knee-high boot)

Just a few shopping tips:

• When shopping for this list, pick a color scheme that looks best on you and only buy things within that color scheme so your wardrobe will mix and match seamlessly.


• Never make the mistake of buying something just because it's on sale (a lesson I'm still trying to learn) - always go for quality over quantity - as adults we aren't growing, so one good quality classic piece can last forever


• Nevertheless, it doesn't hurt to search for coupons before you shop and pick stores that are having sales!


• As SAHMs, we don't need to make extra trips to the drycleaners when we know our kids will be spilling on us and wiping their noses on us all day! Opt for fabrics that you can wash at home and do not need to be ironed frequently


• To make your wardrobe as versatile as possible, choose fabrics and colors that are seasonless (sturdy knits and cottons, jersey, wool blends, etc.)


• Create your own list of essentials. Complete the shopping for those essentials, and then (and only then) add to your wardrobe your own personal flair items (hats, scarves, fun dresses, and skirts, etc.)


• If you get overwhelmed shopping in large department stores, pick one sub-department in that department store to narrow down your choices (i.e, just the petites section, or just the juniors section)


• Bring a friend or spouse (someone whose opinion you appreicate) with you to get a second opinion on if the item really suits you


• Don't try to shop for all these items at once! You are not on reality TV!


• Remember to not buy anything that doesn't fit perfectly (no matter how cheap) unless you can get it altered, and it is worth the money it would take to alter it


• Remember to buy clothes that accentuate the smallest part of your waist (whether that be under your bust, or right at your waist)

Feel free to add to make a comment of what you think should be added to Missi's and my "essential list" - or we'd love to get more shopping tips from you all as well!

Follow up on "finding my style Part III"

I've been reminded that some people can't do a short cut based on their hair texture (thank you Jules)! I thought I would mention that I meant to say short-to-medium cuts. Even then, I'm sure girls with spiral curly hair also like to keep their hair long, and yet, they don't have to straighten or curl their hair for it to look styled.

So I needed to follow up that last style post with the point that I think every woman needs to make sure her hair looks styled. A styled cut usually means a shorter cut, as styling shorter hair is easier than styling longer hair. For this reason, I think shorter is better to achieve a polished and stylish look. For those of us with wavy or full-bodied thick hair (like myself), or for those of you with super curly hair, you may never be able to wear your hair short! Nevertheless, you can keep it layered to give your hair shape and body, and as often as you can keep it looking styled, (whatever that may mean for you) keep it styled!

Finding my style Part III

The next style issue I've had to address recently is that of a hairstyle. A woman's hair is the best accessory she owns. It is oftentimes the first thing someone notices about her, and really says a lot about her personality. If you, like me, are looking to polish your look and define your style, then after clearing out your wardrobe and determining what colors look best on you, a haircut should be your next step.

With the short cut being so trendy right now, I've really wanted to cut my hair. I've used virtual makeover sites to see which short cut would be the best on me, and have come very close to calling a hairstylist to make an appointment to cut it.

The bottom line is the shorter to medium-length cuts are almost always going to make a bigger style statement than long hair. Why? Because, most women with long hair don't do much with it, besides throw it in a ponytail. With a shorter cut, your hair looks instantly styled with minimal effort. Shorter hair frames your face, allows for bounce and movement, and keeps your hair healthy, which will give it extra shine. Longer hair can end up with split ends, leaving it dull and lifeless. Long hair can weigh so much that you will have no bounce or movement. And more often times than not, long hair is worn either pulled back from your face, or hanging in strings far below your face.





After analyzing photo after photo of really great short cuts...









I've come to the conclusion that everyone should wear a stylish short cut...UNLESS they are willing to take the time and effort to keep their long hair styled. If you have the time to wear your hair either perfectly coiffed, curled, or straightened, then by all means...keep it long! But if not, get a smart cut that will give you that instant style oomph!

But for those of you whose style is romantic (like mine), and if you are willing to pay the price, there is certainly nothing wrong with keeping your hair long...







After much thought over what my signature look should be, or maybe already is, I've decided that I just wouldn't be "me" without my long hair. I know at some point I'll cut it short, but for now I'm going to stick to my old look and just force myself to keep it styled so that it will look like a "style!"


And yes, the photo above is from our family photo shoot we had on Saturday.

Finding my style Part II (long version of how I will start buying clothes in the right color for me)

As a young girl in the mid-80's, "color experts" were becoming very popular. It was common to hear other women talking about whether they were a "summer" or a "winter", "spring" or "autumn". No one ever bought a color that wasn't in their designated color palette!

By the time I was 8 years old, I joined our local 4-H club, but not to participate in the livestock activities, only to participate in the home economic activities. I took cooking classes, sewing classes, and beauty/fashion classes. At the end of the semester, each student was to write a speech, complete with props and poster board aids about the one subject they enjoyed most that year. We were to give our speech in front of judges, and could go on to different levels to win the award for that year's best speech.

I decided my speech would be about fashion. I gave the speech in a dress my Mom had helped me sew. I was going to tell the judges that you should only wear colors that bring out the sparkle in your eyes, the rosy pink in your cheeks, and the shine in your hair. My speech started out with me stirring in pearls, perfume bottles, make-up, and barrettes in a bowl, reading my "fashion" recipe aloud as I stirred. At the end of reading the recipe of pearls and perfume I looked up and said, "But something is missing!" The judges loved it when I began to tell them that the missing beauty ingredient was to wear the right color.

At the end of my speech each female judge asked me to give them a color analysis. I very proudly told them what I thought and got the highest award, making me eligible for the next round.

I was so confident then about what colors were best. If you had cool toned skin you wore cool colors; warm toned skin, warm colors. If your skin was olive toned, you would look at the hair and eyes to help discern the color palette. Gold flecks in the eyes meant you were warm, and blue sheen in the hair meant you were cool.

Mom and I decided that I was a summer since I had mousy brown hair, pink toned beige skin, and the flecks in my brown eyes were green instead of gold.

As I got older and my coloring changed, I came to realize that picking out the right color isn't as easy as all that. My hair is now a warmer shade of brown, but my skin is a cross between warm and cool (blue veins, beige/olive tone). Since my 8-year old bout with fashion, I have been told by color analysts that I was a summer, spring, winter, and autumn. No one seems to agree! Since no one agreed on what color looked best, I just started wearing whatever color I happened to have or happened to be on sale.

What I've ended up with is a very incohesive wardrobe that is difficult to mix and match. There is no rhyme or reason for the colors in my closet, and there are maybe one or two things that I pick out to wear in my closet because I love the color.

I think those women had it right in the 80's! I plan on only buying clothes now that are in a color that I really love and really looks good on me. I won't go around with an autumn or winter color palette picking out only those colors, but I will remember to put the garment close to my face and see how it blends. Does the color wash me out? Does this color make me look flushed and happy?

In buying only colors that look good on me, I think I'll start noticing a trend in my closet, allowing me to mix and match garments with ease, and to be more excited and confident about what I already have.

So here is what I've learned so far:

1) Get rid of clothes in your closet that don't fit you properly (and cannot be altered), get rid of clothes that you don't need, want, or that simply do not look good on you. (This is slow going if you don't have the funds to replace everything right away, so don't be too eager in getting rid of what you have).

2) Figure out what inspires you and what looks you want to emulate. Create an inspiration board of these looks.

3) Figure out what colors look best on you and only buy clothing if it is in your color. For those of you who are curious as to what "season" they are, check out this website for color tests and suggested color palettes.

Finding my style PART ONE (caveat: very long post!)

I've decided to start blogging again about my journey of "finding my style." Beware, though - my posts will be more verbose with less pictures from here on out since I will be explaining my thoughts on the matter.

Everyone knows that the first step to figuring out your style is to go through your wardrobe. Figure out what you actually like and don't like. Get rid of everything you don't like and start working from there. So I went through my closet and threw out a bunch of things that I just wore because it was something new to wear, or because it was on sale. I got rid of everything that really doesn't fit me, too. Unfortunately, I was left with very few things, but that gives me a chance to then replace everything with something that I will really love and that is really "me."

As I've been reading on other blogs (and from Missi), the next step to finding my style was to start an inspiration board. I love this idea. I started looking through my Vogue, J.Crew, and In Style magazines, and cut out pictures of anything that I thought was something I wanted to emulate, or anything that spoke to me. Yesterday I bought four squares of corkboard from Target for only $5.69.

Below are pictures of the beginnings of my inspiration boards with very long explanations of why they inspire me...

I cut this picture out because it represented something important to me that I've really been struggling with.

I spent most of my life being different. I grew up in a very conservative, Christian home, the second oldest of 11 children, and was homeschooled. To make me even more different, for a while my family avoided wearing any clothes that were trendy, because we were looking to be "in the world, but not of the world." When I turned 15, I started only wearing skirts and dresses that were below the knee so I would look as feminine (and also as modest) as possible. During that time the "it" look for my age was grunge. Yes, I stood out in my ankle length skirts and dresses.

As my family and I grew, we eventually became less and less extreme, and I think struck a balance. We still opt for the more conservative side of dressing, but have found that following a clothing trend does not make us "of the world." We don't want to dress "slutty" in anyway, but have found that dressing as attractively as possible makes a better statement to the world than covering up for dear life.

Since I spent so many years being different, I have enjoyed following the crowds with what I wear, and blending in through my young adult and young married years. Since starting this blog, however, I have yet again become "different" and it has recently started to bother me. Most moms scoff at me when they see me chasing my toddler around in wedge heels at the park. Some moms roll their eyes at me when I am wearing tights and a dress while shopping. I get snarls from other moms if I'm seen in heels, and am constantly getting comments (which are more like accusations), about how I manage to walk around in stilettos when I'm holding a toddler.

I think most moms just thought I was trying too hard, and wondered why I couldn't just put on a t-shirt and jeans. Maybe other Moms thinks I'm being selfish. Or yet others who simply think I am not being practical and putting my own vanity in front of my child's safety.

I've been thinking hard about this a lot. Evaluating whether I am trying too hard, or whether I care about how I look more than my child. Do I do this for me, my husband, my friends, or the world? The picture of this young Mom in her spectacular evening gown, but with her young son peeking out from behind her skirt, her Converse sneakers and simple cardigan sweater taming down her look, made me realize that I dress this way because it is "me". Nothing is wrong with a t-shirt and jeans, but nothing is wrong with heels and a dress either...EVEN if you're a Mom. It doesn't make me any less of a Mom if I wear a dress than if I wore jeans.

I think it's time for me to embrace being "different" again and keep my dressing standards. It's ok to wear 4 inch heels when you're a Mom if that's what you like. It's ok if I want to wear tights and dresses when other moms are wearing jeans and tennis shoes. This IS my style.

So the picture above is my favorite and that is why my "Mother in red" gets her very own board.
This next board represents a few things. In the corner you see a white shirt from Banana Republic. Plain, boring, but classic. This is a reminder to me that I need to remember to stick to classic pieces that never go out of style.

I also have a picture of Reese Witherspoon on her daily jog. Reese has three children, and yet she still stays fit. Maybe I don't always get to jog, but this reminds me to workout everyday.

The roses are pins from J.Crew. This is a reminder to me to keep everything I wear as feminine as possible, because that is what I like best. There is nothing more feminine than a rose brooch.

Then the nail polishes represent colors I want to wear more of. Deep, warm reds and burgundies. I'm not sure how long these colors will stay on my inspiration board, though, as I'm still exploring what colors I think really look good on me.

This next board is my hair inspiration board. In the middle is a picture I drew of myself with very short hair. Beneath that are two pictures of models with gorgeous long hair. I am always getting the urge to cut my hair short so I can look like the other Moms, and the super chic Hollywood style icons. Everyone is cutting their hair into a super sexy bob right now and I definitely have the itch. I think short cuts are so gorgeous on everyone! Nevertheless, my signature look is long hair and I think I need to stick to that. So everytime I get the urge to see myself with short hair, I can just look at this board, and then look beneath it and realize that no matter if I would look cute with short hair, I can't help but love long hair.

This last board is my "outfit looks" board. Each gal above is wearing something in the right cut, style, and color, for me (I think, at least). I love these outfits and want to emulate them as closely as possible in my own wardrobe.

So that's that for now. I may post some pictures of my outfits from time to time as I keep figuring this all out, and I will certainly post every time I have an epiphany of sorts on this topic.

One quick tip I found yesterday, too...

I had to leave the house by a certain time in order to make it somewhere before they closed, but I didn't want to miss my workout. So I worked out, leaving myself only 30 minutes to shower, dress, get my son dressed, and get out the door! This meant I had no time to really dress. Since as a Mom I don't get out much, I like to make the most of dressing whenever I do go out, even if it is just to run errands. Nevertheless, since I had only 10 minutes to fix my wet hair, put my makeup on, and pick an outfit out, I decided to just wear my corduroys and a long sleeve t-shirt. Still, I wanted to up my style quotient as best as I could for the circumstances. I threw on a belt, a cool hat, big earrings, and wore darker lipstick than normal and managed to really dress up an otherwise plain outfit.

Sometimes I take too much time picking out what to wear so that it looks different, or makes some sort of style statement, and I forget that it's not that complicated. Add a few statement accessories, and that's all you need.